I suffer acute pain in my chest abdomen, shoulder and arms, it took several years for doctors to rule out a variety of possible conditions. This included a cardiogram and other invasive procedure. Following a two year wait I eventually had a neurosurgical operation which gave me a year of reduced pain then after a year or so, the operation failed. I take a variety of medications including opiates and occasional steroid injections. I live daily with radicular pain from damage to my upper cervical vertebrae. I had been taking images with my camera but during the period before and after I found that the process of photography helped distract if not alleviate the pain I was experiencing. I felt disbelieved by people and the medical profession and experienced self-doubt and confusion. I tried to maintain normal life and people could not see the stress of my condition. I wanted to the image to expose the dark and confusing place of radicular pain when your spine and nervous system shares sharp and debilitating pain across your body. I was also assessed as being dyslexic and the images shares that confusion an inner chaos that invisible disability causes.
Instagram: @jfergusonimages
Title: My spine is a cloud
Image Copyright: John Fergusson
Image Description: Yellow and black image of a figure of a person, with clouds within the outline of the person. The background is dark and barren.Title: Radicular 1
Image Copyright: John Fergusson
Image Description: Monochrome image of a figure sat in a chair, whose interior is comprised of twigs and branches. The person is sat next to a window.Title: Hidden in plain site
Image Copyright: John Fergusson
Image Description: Black and white image of a person fading into the background of trees and grass. The person is wearing a long dark coat.Title: 9 on a scale of 10
Image Copyright: John Fergusson
Image Description: Bright white and dark green/grey image with mixed textures and a long, serpent like image across the bottom left quadrant of the photo.
Your story and photos made me cry. I am right with you in the chronic pain world. Just had a total knee reconstruction. Pain was out of this world. I just kept telling myself to calm down and let time pass. I don’t know what life without pain is, it comes in waves like your snake. Beautiful work, thanks for understanding. Back to faking it for the world!
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